The Mom Health Crisis

I think that title is a bit dramatic, and maybe misleading BUT, I want to talk about it so let’s go.

The maternal health crisis is not the one to which I am currently referring (though that is a BIG problem that we as a nation need to address) what I want to talk about here is being a mom and putting our health last because we are managing all the other humans and all the other things ALL DAY LONG.

Somewhere along the way, it was narrated that as a mother we must do ALL the things, be self-sufficient, never get sick, be happy, be nurturing, and love the hell out of our kids, ALL THE TIME. Oh, and at the same time just be ok with being exhausted, burned out, and maybe just sad/angry/miserable because that is what motherhood is all about.

Sister-Mama-Friend, I’m not about this life. If any of what I just wrote above resonates with you it’s time for you to not be about it either.

I read somewhere (probably on Pinterest) something like “Mom’s don’t get sick, we don’t have time for that shit” and it’s true but it’s also wrong. There are jokes galore about the “man cold” but seriously, why is it that when we hit our wall it’s just expected that we’ll suck it up and keep at it because it’s just what we are supposed to do?

I’m going to raise my hand right now and say that I have been guilty, on numerous occasions. I have to be knocked down so hard I cannot physically leave my home in order to stop. Or, rather, that was me. Now (in this moment) I can tell you that when I need to stop, I stop.

Taking care of ourselves is NOT a selfish act. I’d argue choosing martyrdom over not taking care is a greater slight.

Before I go any further, I’ll be transparent and say I come from what would be considered a space of “priviledge” to say these things. I have a husband/partner that takes responsibility for the role he plays in our children’s lives and is an active participant in our daily routine. I have my own business and I make my own schedule. I am usually in command of how I spend my time (that isn’t an accident) so my ability to make my health and wellness a priority has been a non-negotiable as well as being part of my job.

But back to my point, Mom’s bust their butts all day and take care of everyone else before they take care of themselves. I’m not just talking about flowery “self-care” like bubble bath’s with scented candles, getting your nails done, or getting a massage (Personally I find that those hurt like a SOB and so while they are self-care and necessary they are NOT what I call relaxing). I’m referring to the act of consciously choosing to make our health (of which self-care is a part) a priority.

Raise your hand if any of the following sound like you:

  • Hit a wall by 3pm
  • Need coffee to get it together in the morning, or anytime during the day
  • Bloated and uncomfortable even when you aren’t pregnant, PMSing or just ate Chipotle
  • All the Brainfog
  • Tired as hell but can’t fall asleep at night
  • Little to zero sex drive

All of these things are common, and I’m willing to bet you’ve assumed most of them just come with being a mom. Common and normal are not the same thing, and everything on that list is a signal from your body that it wants you to pay attention. But we don’t because #momlife.

Well Mamacita, if you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired I’m here for you. None of the symptoms mentioned above just disappear and go away. There is a reason your body is communicating with you through these symptoms (inflammation, auto-immune disease, food allergy or intolerance, hormone imbalance, adrenal fatigue, etc) even if your primary care physician has told you everything is “normal”.

The road is often long, and sometimes it isn’t pleasant, but after the shitstorm that was 2020 I learned that if I don’t have a vested interest in my own health, then only those that profit from me being unwell will.

You keep fifty balls in the air at all times Mama, sometimes those balls crash down, and sometimes you need to put a few to the side so that you can take care of you and get them back in the mix. Taking your health and wellness seriously isn’t selfish, it isn’t out of your reach, and you and everyone around you will benefit if you decide it’s worth your focus. Take care, and we’ll navigate together.

Your fellow Mama in Wellness

~S

What the Health??

When you hear the word health, what comes to mind?

To you, what is the picture perfect definition of the word?

Do you fit into that picture?

Why or why not?

I got into the fitness world almost a decade ago because I saw for the first time that women could be strong as hell, lift heavy stuff, and not actually have to worry about getting “bulky” (Can you guess what I was told growing up???) But as most people do, I found the more I dove into different disciplines, the more that I saw being strong was such a small piece of a very intricate puzzle.

Health to me is all-encompassing. If 2020 taught me nothing else it was how much I value what I perceive to be “good health” and diving deeper into all the things I can do to tweak and maintain it.

It includes physical, mental, and emotional health, and deep dives into various aspects of each health pillar. I’ll go out on a limb and say I dive a bit deeper then the average human on these topics and I spend a decent amount of time “bio-hacking” on myself to figure out what works best for ME, and then what might be beneficial to the people that trust me as their trainer and coach.

Our bodies are BRILLIANT machines, and they are made to run as such when we treat them as such. Modern convenience and lifestyle has turned us into lazy, sugar-addicted, screen worshipping zombies. I’ll be the first to raise my hand and say I’m just as involved as anyone else.

In the same breath I acknowledge where I can be/do better, where I’m not willing to budge and where I know I need to do SOMETHING because otherwise it’s just madness.

My goal here is to provide insight and be of assistance to anyone trying to navigate health themselves while maybe not having a specific starting point. We ALL start somewhere, SOMETHING is better then NOTHING, and no two people are exactly the same so what works for you may not work for someone else.

Instead of all the screaming, polarizing and condescension that seems to go down on all the big social platforms I’m going to hang out here and see what happens.

Thanks for reading/ following along. I’m excited to wax poetic about our bodies, brains and feelings (I couldn’t come up with a third “b” word to insert there). If there’s something specific you want to hear about leave me a comment below.

Thanks!

~S

Women & Weights- Part 2

In part one of this series we discussed why strength training was beneficial (If you missed that post click here)

Now lets talk about how to get started on your own personal strength training journey.

If strength training is completely new to you, then an ideal first step is going to be finding a coach or trainer to work with. Preferably in person, but this day in age online is also a solid option. One-on-one coaching will give you the most concentrated attention to detail, and you don’t have to do it forever. Long enough to get a solid foundation, twice a week for 12 weeks is the shortest time I’d recommend.

I’m going to take this opportunity to call out something that makes me just an angry as women being told not to strength train, and that’s people actually getting hurt working with a trainer. Accidents happen, but stupid shit also happens when people don’t pay attention or have an agenda that has nothing to do with you and your goals.
Here are a couple things you might not know if you are new to a gym setting.

Not all trainers/ coaches are created equal.
The barrier to entry in the fitness industry is pretty low, and in the online space it’s even lower. Credentials are an important thing to inquire about and even then some of those are better then others.
I am partial to NSCA, ACSM, and NASM when it comes to the “governing bodies” that oversee personal training and strength training. I can attest to the fact that in order to pass those tests you have to have a decent knowledge of how the body works. Also, most people that have a degree in exercise science or the like have at least one of those designations under their belts. Is it the end all be all? No, but it is a solid place to start.
If the trainer you are interested in doesn’t have a certification (which they may not), ask them about their experience. What do they do for continued education? How do they stay current on information? See if you can speak to one of their current clients. Look into it as deeply as you need to in order to feel good about the decision.

Trainers in “Big” gyms work on commission.
That doesn’t mean they don’t know what they are doing. There are many trainers in big-box gyms all over the country helping change people’s lives. But it can mean they are really good at sales and telling you that you need something significantly more then you actually do because they need to hit their numbers for the month. Sorry not sorry, I hate pushy slimy sales which is why I have never worked in a gym like that. I’m not going to tell you something you don’t need, the time in the gym is about YOU, not me, and that’s how it should be.

If the trainer you get set up with does more talking about themselves then listening to you, mark that a red flag.
As I said above, training a client is about their needs and goals, not what the trainer has accomplished as a trainer or athlete. You are hiring this person to teach you a new skill, something that can be dangerous if not advised in an intentional manner. If you don’t feel heard in that first meeting, it’s acceptable to ask for someone else.

There should be some kind of movement assessment and paperwork before you actually begin lifting anything.
Even elite level athletes have basic movement patterns they need to revisit, and a pattern that isn’t ideal needs to be addressed before a movement is loaded. Injuries happen when people get over zealous. In most facilities you will have to fill out some fairly extensive paperwork about your health (past and present). It is equally as important for you to disclose all information as it is for your coach to collect it. Injuries that may seem inconsequential to you, could be a piece of the puzzle that we need to know in order to plan accordingly.

You can fire your trainer/ coach at any time.
The only bad part here might be how much money you are out, but if at any time you are unhappy or just not jiving with your trainer you can cut the cord. As a trainer myself I hope if you didn’t feel like you were getting what you paid for that you would speak up. We are adults here, so conversation is a two-way street. But if even after you converse, you don’t feel heard #girlbye.

My point is discussing all of this is not to discourage you from getting started, quite the opposite really. If I had to sum it up in one sentence it would be this- make sure the person you are working with is someone you feel better being around. Your trainer or coach should be assisting you towards your goals, and overall it should be an interaction that adds value to your life, not sucks the life out of you.

If hiring a coach is not in your budget, there are many other options out there to get you started. Fitness apps abound, and there are some great coaches out there that put educational and helpful content out on their social media, blogs and websites. The internet can also be a black hole of less then optimal information so proceed with caution.
Besides my own content (found here and here) below are other resources I send people to when they ask about various topics and would like to do some reading on their own.

  1. Strong First
  2. Girls Gone Strong
  3. B!RTHF!T
  4. Ben Bruno Training
  5. Coach Karen Smith

To wrap this up, if you are new to strength training, one of the best things you can do for yourself is hire a coach or trainer to get you started. Having their eyes on you to watch for things you are likely not aware of, as well as use consented tactile cuing are attributes that you cannot get from going the journey on your own. Find someone you like and feel can help you to reach the goals you have for yourself.

If I resonate with you, then let’s connect. You can reach me me by leaving me a comment below, DMing me on social media, emailing me at sara@activelylivingawesome.com or you can apply for my coaching program here.

The third and final installment of this series will be things you should know about strength training to get the most out of your workouts. Have a great week!

~S